Beginning Today...

I've been keeping a journal on and off for a couple of years but I've found that I spend way more time on the internet than in front of a piece of paper with an ink pen in my hand so I'm going to give blogging a try.  I'll still keep a handwritten journal too so that one day when I'm gone, my kids will have something to hold and cherish with the life story of their Mom and Dad.  My journal is actually one of my most prized possessions.  Every now and then I'll include a picture in it to go along with the entry of the day or print out an e-mail that was particulary sweet from Greg.
Beginning today though, this is my journal I'll share with the world.  It may prove to be just ordinary and boring to some but for me, this is my life and I love the life I'm living. 

I learned a lesson today. It's probably going to sound insignificant but it was a lesson, nonetheless.  After Emme got up from her nap I thought about how nice it was outside and thought it would be a good evening to take her to the park.  When I got there, I quickly found out that a lot of other people had the same idea.  I pulled into a parking space and evaluated the situation.  Did I really want to get up there with all those other parents, just me and Emme?  No...I didn't.  I wanted to just turn around and go home and play in the backyard where we could have privacy.  Emme wouldn't run the risk of being run over by another kid and I wouldn't have to feel insecure around all those other parents.  I wonder why, at 32 years old I still feel insecure?  Shouldn't I be over that by now?  I was ready to back out of my parking spot and head back to my comfort zone when I glanced in my rearview mirror and seen Emme's little head all perked up trying to see what was going on at the playground in front of us.  It dawned on me that I was being selfish.  I remembered my original plan:  Get outside, enjoy the nice weather and let Emme play at the park.  My outgoing little girl is only 19 months old.  She has no insecurites....she just wants to play.  I put my car in park and followed her lead.
After I got her out of the carseat, I put her down on the sidewalk next to me and reached for her hand.  She held on for only a second before she took off as fast as lightning toward the swingset.  "Here we go," I thought to myself.  We approached the kids and parents and Emme immediately fit right in.  I stood there, feeling a little awkward while she began climbing onto the stairs of the play area.  I watched her interact with the other kids and I began silently praying that she never loses that confidence. 
Then, the thing that I never expected to happen, happened.  Another Mom walked up to the playground with her two little kids and she began talking with me.  We talked and talked until before we knew it, the sun started to fade away and the air began getting chilly.  Before we left, the conversation led to Facebook and she added me as a friend.  And just like that, I learned my lesson of the day:  You can't make new friends when you stay in the privacy of your own backyard.